School Addition is Front for Brothers’ Residence Pool

By Zach Radel, Reporter
October 10, 2014

In a recent interview with a construction worker taking part in the new addition to the school, it was discovered that the new “Fine Arts Wing” school construction, that allegedly was to become a new music room and other classrooms, is actually a front for the construction of a new brothers pool to replace the old one in the basement. Most students at Xavier are aware of the existence of the secret brother’s pool, although none of have actually been able to produce evidence (if you were not aware, Br. Ryan would be happy to fill you in).

Below is the interview with a construction worker (albeit with a different question path than was originally intended)

Note: The construction worker only agreed to the interview on the condition of anonymity.

Kestrel: So as I’m sure you know, many of the new students are excited about the new addition, So how is the build schedule coming?
Construction Worker: Well so far we’re a bit ahead of schedule so we should be finished at some point in the spring.
K: What part of the construction process are you in right now?
C  W: Right now we are finishing the infrastructure of the building but that should be done soon enough.
K: Ok, so after the infrastructure is finished, what comes next?
C W: After infrastructure we will most likely move on to installing the plumbing for the filtration system and drainage before we move on to actually setting up the water tight frame.
K: Wait a second. Forgive my ignorance but what do you need a filtration system and a water tight frame for in the new construction?
C W: Well I don’t know how you build pools but generally you want the water to be clean and for it not to leak so filters and being water tight are kind of important.
K: Right but what role does that play in the building of a new music room and chemistry lab?
C W: I don’t know what addition your talking about, but the addition were working on is a giant indoor pool connected to the [Brother’s Residence]
K: I’m sorry but the student body was under the assumption that the school was getting a new music room and chem lab with a hallway connecting the SJ staircase to a new hallway in the brother’s residence.
C W: Yeah….no we were given plans to build an indoor pool connected directly to the brother’s residence part of the building.
K: So there is no intention to build a new music room for the school?
C W: If there is then we’re not building it.
K: Well this interview seems to have brought up more questions than it answered but thank you for your time.

At press time, there has not been any confirmation on whether this new information has any truth to it, but an unnamed teacher claims to have seen a stockpile of pool noodles in the corner when he traveled through the brother’s residence the other day.