*PLEASE NOTE THAT ALL EVENTS ARE FICTIONAL*

February 22, 2021; A reporter named Aidan Pesce attempted to expose the Kestrel’s true colors. Few days later, he was never seen again. And here am I, Trevis Idonthaveamiddlenamebecausemyparentsdidntgivemeone Vohoang, now a freshman in the Kestrel, have come to investigate, 4 years after the incident. Here’s how it all happened.

The Hole in the Basement

One day, I went to the basement with my brother, Tranhy, and my friends: JP Costello, Saif Khan, and Jonas Healey. We were taking a trip down there due to the Railroad Club having a meeting. Suddenly, we found a hole with a ladder. Because we were bored, we climbed down without anyone’s notice. The ladder was surprisingly sturdy for all of us with Jonas climbing down first. When we made it to the end which was very deep, we saw a path, so we walked.

The path was extremely long. We were also underground, which can make us lose oxygen. We were luckily able to thanks to some mysterious oxygen blocks. All of a sudden, I found sleeping gas having entered and we all fell asleep.

I woke up with JP and we see a lot of file folders and papers around the room. I also found a computer that was still on which had Aidan Pesce’s article. In the article, we learned about the council and how it was created. Out of nowhere, a shadowy figure popped up, JP pulled out a metal pole to confront it. Turns out, it was Luke Pandiani who somehow ended up here.

Turns out, Luke knew about the whole Aidan Pesce Article, and we decided to investigate the files. We found a paper which shows that the council was “democratically” elected and there are 7 members compared to 2020-2021’s 5. This tells me that they are elected every 2 years with the most recent being 2024. Out of 15 potential candidates we learned that the seven we were confronting are (see graph): Vivek Ramaswamy, Mikhail Gorbachev (somehow), Benjamin Franklin (somehow), Mr. St. George, Nick Cuozzo, Eminem, and Sean O’ Sullivan. After learning about this, we decided to split up and find the rest.

Finding the others

To combat losing each other, Luke got us walkie talkies that are “more indestructible than a Nokia” I later found Tranhy who found Calen Abbott in the hallway who was apparently looking for me. I told them everything I know about the council, and how they are planning to conquer the world

Suddenly, the walkie talkie made sound, it was JP who found Saif in the infirmary and told me that he will be at the McDonald’s. My group and I followed suit. We eventually found the city, which was huge, scary huge. We decided to go to the carnival when I heard a familiar voice; “Trevis? What are you doing here?” It was Nick Faraci who said that hooded figure knocked him out and found himself here. Alongside him was Camillo Coutin-Vasquez who said the same thing. I asked them if they know where the McDonald’s is? They pointed to the Last Ride, a roller-coaster. So, we went in the direction.

We met up with JP and Saif and ate some nuggies together. We discussed ways to disguise ourselves since the council would know us by now. We decided to go with code-names and Luke can tell us by our voices. JP also found a crate of more walkie talkies for all of us. Then, the walkie talkies made noise. (Pandiani Code is in there, translations are on parentheses)

LP: This is Pandiani, and I have rescued Morris, over.

JC: This is Mikado, and I am with Osprey, and we found the rest of our lunch table. Over.

LP: Fantastic, the wheels are going to go round and round (I will meet you there), over.

ME: Alright! The bushes have eyes and pistols. (Watch out for attackers).

LP: Copy that! Over.

ME: This is Osprey signing off.

I have no clue why most of my friends ended up here, but–

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Confronting the Council

When I woke up, I knew that I’ve made it. The council: the ones who rule the Kestrel with an iron fist, the ones who make us write an article every week despite discarding thousands of ideas, and here they are, standing face to face with me and the boys. They started talking to us in an unknown language, which sounds like Chinese, Spanish, and Hindi at the same time.

The question that I have in my head is “Why me and my friend group?” Turns out that they knew that I was going to read Aidan Pesce’s article someday, take the message, spread it to my friend group, and spread it across the school. So, when Eminem, and Nick Cuozzo, finished shouting at us to never defy the Council. I knew it was time to run, because I learned that the ropes were in a special knot invented by Partick Manning, and he told me how to untie it one day. The only way to know, is by doing it.

The Escape

To put it simply: I sneakily untied our ropes and ran. We ran as fast as humanly possible, trying to find every exit imaginable. We would’ve used our walkie talkies but since we’re on the run we have to stay focused. The problem is, since there’s 12 of us and 7 of them, the council brought in 5 anonymous motorcyclists who has some kind of sleeping powder in a spray can. Unfortunately, I was one getting chased, but Saif showed up and told me to get in the golf kart and we drove away.

We got the walkie talkies back in action and we told everyone to meet up at the entrance of the city since it was just a path which leads to the basement. But when we all meet up and attempted to flee, except it was blocked with a forcefield, and 10 men standing there, guarding.

There were 10 of us, and 10 of them. They were hooded figures, armed. We had nothing. One of the hooded figures stepped forward. He had a beard and took off his hood. He was running for council member but cancelled it, and was never on the ballot. But the Council gave him another role. That man is someone on YouTube who is very controversial. His name…

Is Logan Paul. *tuco get out sound plays*

To this day, Trevis Vohoang, Tranhy Vohoang, JP Costello, Calen Abbott, Saif Khan, Jonas Healey, Jacob Morris, Luke Pandiani, Camilo Coutin-Vasquez, and Nick Faraci are all marked missing by Xavier High School. Some sources have said they may be dead. A police search was conducted by friends JZ Lauderdale, Nate Tompkins and Civics Teacher Mr. Passavant. This failed miserably. The article was eventually recovered by the Free Writers of the Kestrel but due to political issues, the group disbanded. Mr. St. George was later fired and arrested after Ben Franklin snitched on him. The basement would eventually close indefinitely.  So, has Trevis done what Aidan Pesce didn’t? Or like him, was too late? Only time will tell…

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(find it out yourself – Sivert Gnaohov)