Xavier: A Terrible Place Where Success is Redefined
With a satirical spin on Xavier High School, contributing writer Alex Ratti explains how Xavier is actually setting students up for failure
October 30, 2014
High school is intended to be an students to relax by letting them fall asleep and take in the experience of being a part of a fine establishment. It is also meant for telling students that failing multiple classes is not a bad thing and losing every sports game by a lot is acceptable. Xavier High School does not follow any of these requirements, therefore, it does not meet the criteria for its advertisement as a prestigious school.
The first example of this failure is the fact that Xavier does not let kids fail. At school, all of the kids pay attention in class, take notes, and get involved in daily lessons. Kids are supposed to ignore the teacher while talking in the back of the room, but instead at Xavier they’re taking notes while they should be making spitballs out of them. Xavier High School never lets their students do any of this, instead they correct the students by giving them detention, and by actually upholding the rules. At schools, students should be able to get away with cheating, stealing, and even skipping classes. At Xavier, there are cameras placed all around the school watching those students to make sure that none of these things happen. What kind of fun is that? Isn’t that the point of high school? Xavier takes away all of the fun that students should have and makes it a place of learning, unlike at most schools where students are forced to have fun.
Secondly, the sports teams at Xavier High School are terrible. Every year, the football, baseball and basketball teams win more than they lose. In present society, this is unacceptable because in order for the students to grow and prosper, they need to experience what losing feels like. At Xavier, they always win, so none of the students are able to have that learning experience that is needed to grow as an athlete. At some other schools, sports teams have the pleasure of never winning a game all season. How do you think they feel when they cannot play in the state playoffs? Xavier crushes the hearts of these schools by always winning and advancing far into the state playoffs while simultaneous not setting their students up for success by never allowing them to fail.
Thirdly, at Xavier High School, there are no girls. This is an outrage! Now during class, kids will have to focus on what the teacher is watching instead of worrying about who the most attractive girl in class is wearing. High school is all about growing as a human and ogling at women is a part of a young man’s life that should be fulfilled in high school. Xavier takes away all of the things that we need in order to make our high school experiences beneficial to us.
Xavier High School is one of the worst high schools in the state because the students pay attention in class, they always win in sports, and there are no girls. They are an embarrassment to all of the schools who allow their students to fail miserably and have a low percentage of people going to college. Don’t send your kid to Xavier if you want him to have a successful high school career.
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Chett Vogt • Feb 4, 2015 at 2:51 pm
This article suprised me at first because of the title. After I began reading I was noticing how all the things the author wrote about Xavier were true. In Xavier, there is no place for fun, because you are so busy succeeding. Like the author said, “Xavier takes away all of the fun that students should have and makes it a place of learning, unlike at most schools where students are forced to have fun.” I believe that if there was more freedom at Xavier, nothing would really be accomplished. Kids would earn poorer grades and eventually the reputation of Xavier would decrease. Like the author said “Xavier crushes the hearts of these schools by always winning and advancing far into the state playoffs while simultaneous not setting their students up for success by never allowing them to fail.” If Xavier did not have the rules it did today, we might not be so ready to listen to the coaches and improve. “Kids are supposed to ignore the teacher while talking in the back of the room, but instead at Xavier they’re taking notes while they should be making spitballs out of them. Xavier High School never lets their students do any of this, instead they correct the students by giving them detention, and by actually upholding the rules.” It’s strange seeing how that at my old school I would do these things, but since my acceptance to Xavier I cannot believe I did any of it. Im glad Xavier has taken away these things because ít has made me change for good.
Jack Xenelis • Jan 8, 2015 at 2:58 pm
I as well found this piece quite comical. This is exactly what I expected to read in this article. Therefore, I disagree with almost everything in this article. First of all, in the first paragraph, the idea being stated about high school is completely false. The main reason for high school is to educate students to a great learning level and prepare them for college and the rest of their lives. It is to teach the students how to behave and how to show themselves in the real world. Not any of what was written above. Second, “all of the kids pay attention in class, take notes, and get involved in daily lessons. Kids are supposed to ignore the teacher while talking in the back of the room, but instead at Xavier they’re taking notes while they should be making spitballs out of them. Xavier High School never lets their students do any of this,” is a complete lie. Yeah sure at Xavier High School the faculty and staff go to a higher level of discipline to that, but you can’t say that we don’t do that here. I mean yeah that’s what everyone wants to hear, but in reality, it’s not true. It’s not as bad as normal non catholic all boys schools, but it’s still done no matter where you are. And lastly, I know for a fact that there are a handful of varsity sport teams at Xavier that have never been to or even won a championship for their sport. And when it says kids need to experience what it’s like to lose, besides football or wrestling, any others team knows what it’s like to lose and even end the year with more loses then wins. All in all, this was a well written article but in my opinion, most of what was said is false and truely from one persons point of view.
Josh Murphy • Dec 12, 2014 at 2:58 pm
I found this article pretty funny, at first I did not know what to expect. I noticed the title had satire in it and tagged the word funny. Though it took me a minute to catch on to the idea. Once i caught on, i noticed that the article was well written and it agreed with the satire title. “the sports teams at Xavier are terrible” really got me. Just about every year we excel sports….”while simultaneously not setting their students up for success by never allowing them to fail”, this statement is pretty clever. By advancing into the playoffs athletes would be set up to succeed rather than fail. Then the last line was pretty hilarious, “don’t send your kid to Xavier if you want him to have a successful high school career”. Xavier provides the exact opposite for a student or athlete. I think this was a pretty thought out and clever article which inadvertently pointed out what Xavier is good at.